I have been practicing a lot with the intension of doing it pro. but I have yet to get the ball rolling

I guess I'm in that place now. I used to perform ventriloquism and magic professionally. Then I got a job, wife, family, etc. and pretty much everything performing wise went on the back burner.

Recently started practicing again, but with no real plan to perform. Seems when I was performing there was always something I wanted to learn that took a while to master... and I just didn't have the time! I needed to be enlarging my performing repertoire and didn't want to take a year to develop a good pass, etc. Now, if practice everyday and really am working on new stuff that I've wanted to do for years. Spent 2 weeks working on the mechanics for a good side steal, started reading some books I bought 10 years ago and never really opened, actually learned a new routine, started actually working on new patter for the new routine, started reading "Magic by Misdirection" to really study it this time, etc. When I started back playing, my hands were stiff and wouldn't even do routines I used to do without a second thought. But it's fun this time around and I'm actually learning on a deeper level.

Will I ever perform again? Who knows? Who cares? But if I do, I hope I don't lose the fun factor!

Yes, I'm practicing like mad with no intention of performing.

I sort of stumbled onto magic less than 2 months ago and became instantly obsessed with it. There are several reasons for this: I wanted to learn card tricks and that sort of thing as a kid, but there were no magic shops or books or anything like that in my country. It was unreachable. Now suddenly it isn't.

Secondly, I have an absurdly low self-esteem and need to have various secret skills that the average Joe cannot rival. A Clark Kent syndrom I suppose.

Thirdly, I am having a bit of an (early) midlife crisis and would like to start over from the beginning learning all new things. I hate my life. I want a new education and a different career. Completely different. We modern humans generally live long enough to make it possible to re-start it all at least once. It would be like getting two different lives for the price of one. That is a good thing.

I cannot see myself ever going pro as a magician for several reasons tho. First of all I am almost forty and although I am getting surprisingly good at some things already, there are 18 year olds on YouTube who will always be better than me. Also, although I have a performer locked away inside of me, I know that my nerves are just too overpowering. I cannot even speak properly if there is more than one person present.

So in a way, magic is very pointless for me. I am bitter about having started too late. I am embarrassed about performing even for relatives, knowing that to them it would be shameful to see me do these (in their opinion) childish things instead of finding a job. I know I will never be able to perform. Actually I'm not all that interested in pro magic. I don't even watch magic shows and I think men with eyeliner look creepy.

And yet... I cannot put these cards down. I look in the mirror and sometimes even I cannot tell how that card got to that place even if the hands performing are my own. It is magic! I am ashamed about most things about myself. I'm even ashamed about things I said to other kids in kindergarten! When I was maybe 5 years old. But I'm not ashamed of learning a new skill like this. Or being "childish". Although I'm in a constant state of worry about what other people may think about me, I would never try to assasinate my own personality in order to immitate theirs. And so I may not have much of a life by other people's standards... but it is all mine.

My interest in coin magic is as a hobby, and I know that it takes quite awhile to develop proficiency in coin sleight of hands. In the meantime, I love the fact that manipulating or concealing coins is a perfect way to keep my hands occupied and that I can keep myself amused with just a coin or two. It also challenges me to develop my patience to a high level. It takes a long time to make a coin sleight look 'natural', and I'm in no rush to perform a trick before I have made it look natural.

I have a number of tricks that I perform casually for friends, but some of the tricks that I practice the most don't get shown to anyone. Coin classics such as the Sympathetic Coins, the Peregrinating Halves, the Gadabout Coins and even more modern gems such as Stuck. When tricks rely heavily on sleight of hand skills that require long-term commitment, I'm reminded of how musicians don't give piano concerts once they've learned to play a few bars. A couple of years ago, I had the opportunity to become a practicing member of a zendo. I declined that opportunity, but I oddly find coin tricks fulfilling some of the same functions: it clears my head, it allows me to focus on one thing, and it has me engaging in a practice where the rewards will be seen in long-term diligence rather than in short-term puttering.

Some of the things mentioned so far have been spot-on: it's much harder to perform for people you know (especially, those you see everyday) than to strangers, so... just perform to strangers right away (once you have perfected the practice of course).
Also, the resultant response is much bigger, because strangers actually are intrigued whereas relatives/friends think "Oh, I know Joe; he isn't a wizard; haha, this is fun" and laugh/smile as opposed to gasp. Also, performing in general can become less stressful when (1) you have one backup plan (an "out") for each effect, and (2) you have fun with the performance, as if casually telling a story/joke, as opposed to thinking of it as a "performance".

I guess that begs the question, how do you perform for strangers? I'm mostly a home body. If I'm not at home, I'm at work. I feel I'm in the same position as the OP because I love to read and learn but I just don't get a chance to perform except in front of friends and family.

I like Magic a lot, practice whenever I'm alone or have the time. Bought lots of Books and DVDs even when there isn't much time to read and watch everything or digess that much.
Do not intent to be working class Magician.
I never thought Magic can be learn via books and dvds, thought it's word of mouth, pass down through initiation, choosen few.
Likes the thrill when performing.
Do Magic to a certain few at the right moment only.
I wish it's all just tricks and magic to explain all things else in the world and this made Magic the more alluring to me regardless whether it's for performing or practicing, but not as a working Performer.

Sincerely.

Jason, same boat here, except since I work from home I rarely interact with anyone BUT my family! Best I can suggest is try to find an IBM ring or other magicians and meet on a semi-regular basis.

Some great discussion here, and you've all helped me as well as I'm also:
- in for the hobby
- love to think/invent/dream up routines or modify existing tricks
- not the greatest performer
- have a spouse w/magic "issues"
- even after over 20 years of loving the hobby still feel like a newbie

There's no shame in practicing like mad but never performing. I think someday you may surprise yourself when opportunity knocks. THAT is the real magic

There is nothing wrong with practicing daily even if you do not have any intentions of performing. Practicing stimulates the mind & body, keeps you focused on the task at hand. You might be surprised someday when you casually show someone a sleigjt or effect youo have been working on & the performing bug kicks in! Keep practicing!

My 2 cents

Me too, at the moment, returning to the art after 20 or so years have no real interest in performing. I had my days of glory on the stage as an actor.
However
So you wish to study and perfect your magic. So you only practice with no intent of performing. Then I think you're missing out on something. Magic is more than tricks and more than sleights. A very important part of magic is applied psychology, heck call it crowd control if you wish. You can study about that, sure, but you'll only really acquire a 'gut'-knowledge of it, by actually performing.
The same goes for acting ability, dramatic structure in the act, continuity, .... all essential parts of magic. You can study that, you can train for it, but the proof of the pudding...
Besides, as Robert Angier said in The Prestige. "You never understood why we did it. ... It was... It was the look on their faces".

Ciao for now
Erik

It seems the industry is doing well these days, perhaps fueled by the many afficianados of the art who do not perform. We all do our part!

Erik:

You are right- I have seen that "look" and it is priceless!

I wonder, could someone who is shy about actual performance somewhat develope the skills you mention by video-taping their performances?

Very interesting thread...........I've mentally psych'd myself out to practice more next year. Most magicians I see do a horrible poor job of practicing their patter......(judging by what they say and how they talk). Understanding timing, pacing and meter is a critical part of the delivery. Your mouth is one of your most powerful tools. A magician should be (in my opinion) able to at least deliver a half-decent dramatic monologue, even if not performing an effect.

Be patient with yourself.

Great post-we all get that feeling ^& it does consume us

I think if you have a gift of peforming in any capacity-share it with others- no matter how small the effect or whatever-dont hide all your talent at home!!

We're entitled to shape our hobby any way we like and we shouldn't feel bad about not performing. But for me, practicing without performing would be unfulfilling. I say this as someone who performs only for family and friends, and I still get a bit nervous doing it!

I practice some sleights I'll never use and some tricks I'll never show -- and that's fine. That's one strand of the hobby for sure.

But I also work up routines and show them. The benefits? The high that comes from really amazing people. The pleasure I get if I feel they genuinely enjoyed themselves. The pleasure of being sneaky in a socially acceptable way. The fascinating process of constructing a routine -- setting themes, choosing methods, blocking the actions, creating a script, creatively solving the problems that arise, thinking up new wrinkles on sleights precisely because I have to solve a problem or overcome a weakness, etc.

Also, it's just plain interesting to see what can happen in a live performance. You never anticipate everything. Plus, you can't truly practice magic on your own. It only reaches excellence through performance. Performance is a type of practice -- hopefully, a polishing type, not a stumbling type.

Another point: there are some tricks that absolutely require interaction. You'll never experience Vernon's Out of Sight Out of Mind if you don't do it for someone.

Having said all that, the fact is I know what people mean when they say they just aren't natural performers. That's me. I've tried to learn how to present magic that fits who I am. Unless you have genuine acting ability, you have no choice but to be yourself. You can comfort yourself by saying that if the tricks are strong enough, and presented in a clean way, it's good enough for family fun.

When I started to go to my first magic club, I was aboot 13, the magic buddies of my age said they wanted to go on and become professional magicians. I wanted to go college thinking I would do better in life.

Now I have a masters degree and a good salary, but they are great performers and make a better living than I do.

Their names? Joaquin Ayala, Fernando Keops ans Ednovi.

When I started to go to my first magic club, I was aboot 13, the magic buddies of my age said they wanted to go on and become professional magicians. I wanted to go college thinking I would do better in life.

Now I have a masters degree and a good salary, but they are great performers and make a better living than I do.

Their names? Joaquin Ayala, Fernando Keops ans Ednovi.

I'm still primarily in the practicing stage. I'm nowhere near confident enough to break out a trick in front of strangers. I have performed occasionally for colleagues at work but in my line of work, I have to be careful about this lest I be considered "strange" if you know what I mean. I've yet to go to my local I.B.M. meeting but plan to in the next couple of weeks.

M

True, but the magic is in the performance, not in the tricks. Often these kids focus on the presentation of their slick technique instead of entertaining, so it just comes across as "look what I can." As Wesley James asks in the title of his manuscript, "Why Should I Care?"